When we first moved up here, we were planning to stay for about 2 years, then move to Florida. Josh was planning to stay with his company with hopes of transferring to Melbourne. I guess this was just supposed to be a stepping stone of sorts for us. If we had stuck to that plan, we would be planning on the move now and we would have less than 6 months left up here! At that point I think we also didn't really plan on moving back to NC.
Last week, Josh had a work function and he met a co-worker who is also from NC. He moved up here with intentions of moving his family back to NC, just like us. He was just starting his career up here. He's in his 40s now. He's still here. This kind of worries me...I think? I don't even know. Haha. The money is just a lot better up here. Sure, the cost of living is lower in NC. No, it won't make up for the salary difference. He said he just got comfortable with his salary up here and he just never thought he could re-adjust. He told Josh if we really do want to move back, don't up our lifestyle as we make raises, etc. Start saving for when we do move back. Of course, we haven't planned on increasing our lifestyle, we've planned to increase the amount of money we're paying on debt. Our student loans are higher than we originally thought they would be at this point. The house kind of interfered with those plans. When Josh got his raise, the only thing we really increased is our vacation budget (only by $25 a month though, and this is the beginning of our savings for a big trip before we have kids, not regular vacations), Bailey's budget (for daycare twice a month), and our gift budget by a little bit (it was REALLY tough to stick with our Christmas budget this year). All in all, that's still less than $100 a month. Everything else has gone to savings and debt, so I guess we're on the right track. We just have to be careful that we keep putting that money back in retirement and other savings once all the debt is paid off, rather than spending it on things we want. We already have a rough savings plan, including when and how much we'll save for kids, when and how much we'll put back for a down payment for our second home, etc.
A lot of times, I think buying the house wasn't the best choice for us. We spend SO much more time on it than I thought...and more money too. It's definitely not cheaper than renting, but it's at least an investment. I think if we would have bought our house after Josh has the job he has now, we would have bought a nicer and maybe even bigger house than we did. We almost did that anyway, then we sat down and talked about it. It was hard for me, because I think I was attached to the house, but Josh reminded me that we were buying the house for an investment and it would be better if we bought one that just needed a little work that we could do ourselves. We would have had to cut what we were putting in savings or paying on debt. At that time, that thought didn't bother me. Now it bothers me a lot. I'm SO glad my husband is more practical than I am!
I guess in a few years...more than a few years really, we'll be faced with a very difficult decision. Do we stay in MD or move back home? I think no matter what we decide, we'll have many of those "what if" moments. Right now, the decision seems so simple. We'll move back home before the kids go to school. When the time comes, I don't know if it will be that easy. But at the same time, the possibility that we'll change our minds doesn't seem that unlikely since we've already done it once. We could move to a more rural area up here (there are some really gorgeous areas) and get the same kind of home we hope to have in NC. Of course, we still won't be close to family and friends. But what if family and friends aren't around that area anymore anyway? Why did we move there then? Of course I would love my kids to be raised in the South. Josh says he doesn't notice the lack of southern hospitality until he's been to NC then back up here. I guess when I think of it I don't either. People aren't rude up here. They just don't go out of their way to speak or make nice gestures like they will in NC.
Why do we have to change our minds so much? And why do decisions have to be so difficult?
I completely understand where you are coming from. We change our mind on a day to day basis. LOL. The only constant we have is that we'll end up back in Raleigh at some point. Having Carter has really enforced the idea that I want to raise my kids around our families. If it's hard with a dog, I cant imagine with a kid! Other than that- who knows. haha I'm just playing it by ear now and praying about. The Lord knows better than I where we are meant to be :D LOVE YOU! And you'll figure it out too. And even though I want to keep you all to myself, I'll always support whatever you decide :D
ReplyDeleteI can tell you from my perspective that being far away from family is tough! Living 12 hours away has been so draining on me, and Tyler and I disagree often on what to do about it. I want to be closer to home, but he likes the idea of living in other states. Part of me likes it, but once I've established patients at a practice, it's really impractical to move. Anyway, I understand where you're coming from, and every time we come home, our friends/family ask us, where we plan to end up or when are we coming home. We have to be in NC for 4 years to pay off forgivable loans, but it's still a difficult decision after that time is repaid. Love you!!!!
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